tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9532345550954403052024-03-05T18:13:30.722-08:00Stuck In My HeadA terrifying journey into my thoughts...Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-64184737976013422942012-02-28T17:13:00.000-08:002012-02-28T17:13:46.178-08:00To Whom it May Concern,I know it's your birthday today. That's one of the few things I know about you. I don't know where you are or who you're with but I truly hope that you're feeling loved. I know how frightened you must've been, the last time we were together and I know that you faced decisions far too grown up for someone so young. But please know this: I'm okay. I'm safe and loved and I've always been thankful for your sacrifice. And I never stopped thinking of you, especially as my own candles were lit.<br />
<br />
Sincerely, Your DaughterUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-35875976670972717232011-12-06T13:16:00.000-08:002012-09-25T22:27:53.556-07:00Here's the thing...I heard someone say that God loves us with grace and then defined grace as "undeserved love." <br />
<br />
In a day and age when so many are feeling worthless and unloved, how is it an encouragement to be loved, in spite of yourself? We are human. We aren't perfect, we all make mistakes... Does that make us undeserving? <br />
<br />
I think that the brokeness of the human condition only makes us more in need of unconditional love. If God is going to dole out love as a show of how gracious he is, then he can keep it.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-45681565018594655082011-09-23T00:53:00.000-07:002011-10-18T21:07:57.326-07:00A New PerspectiveThe Help is a beautiful movie that gives insight into what it might have been like to be a black maid in the sixties. It shows, in utter disgust, the degradation and dehumanizing behaviour that was once quite prevalent. It was poignant yet sweet and I cried my eyes out.<br />
<br />
I truly believe with all my heart that 30 years from now we'll all be leaving a theater with wet cheeks and soggy kleenex, although, not from a movie about racism. No, this time the movie will show what it was once like to be gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered or questioning. It will bring us back to a time when religious orders called them 'aboritions' and 'hated by God.' It will relay the struggles the youth of the LGBTQ community went through, with the bullying at schools and the pressures of straight parents, whose worst nightmares are for their kid to 'come out' to them. And it will show how the ignorant politicians closed their eyes to equality, only begging that they don't tell if no one asks. <br />
<br />
We'll leave those theaters feeling smug and self-satisfied. "Look at me," we'll think. "I would never make derogatory comments about someone like that. I would never say 'fag' or laugh at someone pretending to be homosexual or use the word gay like it meant something lame or stupid. I'm horrified that people EVER acted like such heartless animals."<br />
<br />
Until then, I'm getting sick of hearing people say things like, "If they want to be treated as equals, why do they get their own parade? Why do they need to make such issues over everything?" Well. The next time you get your face kicked in simply because you're straight we'll talk. You can have your own damn parade.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-75513437723957745092011-02-09T02:18:00.000-08:002011-02-09T02:18:15.342-08:00real<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">i don't believe in ghosts</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">nor santa nor the hosts</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">i refuse to trust in saints</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">nor dieties in paint</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">i won't let them sway</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">my hopes in any way</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">but i put my faith in you</span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #3d85c6;">for i know you're true</span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZFBsWW1s8miRQFp7ssP7IpMfw9HB0yfnSCoqtFBZ_2mrZQpT_MHdFhX00Upjfz6NvQeaccdeeQUBrCzn_ll4eQndwfghYDlfgThp-L-F0QWd9ytMFB1-99YkjTzvkO84qlLHuRQVk6LU/s1600/tumblr_l4t3kzvPU51qzwepbo1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" h5="true" height="265" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZFBsWW1s8miRQFp7ssP7IpMfw9HB0yfnSCoqtFBZ_2mrZQpT_MHdFhX00Upjfz6NvQeaccdeeQUBrCzn_ll4eQndwfghYDlfgThp-L-F0QWd9ytMFB1-99YkjTzvkO84qlLHuRQVk6LU/s320/tumblr_l4t3kzvPU51qzwepbo1_500.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-36484433153040116582011-02-02T03:10:00.000-08:002011-02-02T03:16:07.836-08:00Hopelessly Hopeful<span style="color: #990000; font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;"><em>I'm a cynic. I believe in the worst life can bring. I fear the dangers that lurk round every bend in the road. I know the cruelty humanity can accomplish. And it is because I see the darkness, hidden in the corners of every room, I may also see the miracle of light. </em></span><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;"><em></em></span><br />
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<em><span style="color: #990000; font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;"></span></em><br />
<span style="color: #990000; font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;"><em>If I had no knowlege of the horrors of this world it would be impossible to recognize the beauty of a selfless gesture. I wouldn't understand how precious it is to hear a kind and loving word. I could never know to treasure the radiance found in the human soul. Most of all, I could never fully understand the wondrous nature of hope.</em></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-33754620615588746132011-01-17T00:51:00.000-08:002011-01-17T00:52:32.391-08:00look at this hole/you've broken me<br />
i'm hollow beaten ruined<br />
look at my face/you're haunting me<br />
i'm shaking stripped ashamed<br />
<br />
look at this mess/you've destroyed me<br />
you're smug and satisfied<br />
look at this life/you're scarring me<br />
i'll never be the sameUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-48565909997080581872010-07-27T03:17:00.000-07:002010-07-27T16:21:14.882-07:00The Prince and the Pea<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnrqZIVUbeOoazUd_XfuvjG_3qSgF7UVxoZkAN1mhz4MF7nxIExNGeeIEzBnI3XzTAkNghd1f1gbZK4HX0qdk1f7twmUFO91w00kYSNe91lg7xNsty9WUnRcxjtG_PUGbGeBLdgccfCd4/s1600/d9e806eeb36e0f25effe679374c4928a94325460.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="262" hw="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnrqZIVUbeOoazUd_XfuvjG_3qSgF7UVxoZkAN1mhz4MF7nxIExNGeeIEzBnI3XzTAkNghd1f1gbZK4HX0qdk1f7twmUFO91w00kYSNe91lg7xNsty9WUnRcxjtG_PUGbGeBLdgccfCd4/s400/d9e806eeb36e0f25effe679374c4928a94325460.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #4c1130; font-size: large;"><strong>To read my latest short story, click here:</strong></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://theprince-thepea.blogspot.com/"><span style="font-size: large;">The Prince and the Pea</span></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #4c1130;"><strong>A new twist on an old tale.</strong></span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-52804341621704647032010-05-11T03:00:00.000-07:002010-05-11T03:18:24.755-07:00Roses<span style="color: #f4cccc; font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">Roses are for love. Not forget-me-not, honeysuckle, silly sweethearts' love but the love that makes you and keeps you whole, love that gets you through the worst your life'll give you and that pours out of you when you're given the best instead.</span><br />
<span style="color: #f4cccc; font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">~~Robin McKinley</span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpoI16sIWRMXxeLQivpWVN2gMH9qBI1iMv9qQIU_oihUzdWrlZOniblPYd0fL8nTRD1xrjJ1GxEjE6Afd8AXrmz28friNmijHXhyphenhyphenlQUAGq_1BmqCjJSH51MH76iVXEe9VYpDkAK-HvIJo/s1600/4435822-md.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpoI16sIWRMXxeLQivpWVN2gMH9qBI1iMv9qQIU_oihUzdWrlZOniblPYd0fL8nTRD1xrjJ1GxEjE6Afd8AXrmz28friNmijHXhyphenhyphenlQUAGq_1BmqCjJSH51MH76iVXEe9VYpDkAK-HvIJo/s400/4435822-md.jpg" tt="true" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">beneath the snow, there lie the roses </span></div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">there's a crack in every heart of stone </span><br />
<span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">an open door that never closes </span><br />
<span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">there's a light to guide you safely home </span><br />
<span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">as time goes by.. </span><br />
<span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">~~RMc</span> </span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnFtW7j5pJ5KCMYLAZIT47pbFFQ2eSpLSP195pkGkrHJhyphenhyphen_3U-anJw1fbt_x6XppeF3A2lk7uFUVL9EyIVn39MVVSROeF1TOSJZUqKaAHZ4wXjXMHIlcXCRhF_84_qk6g8ZnffLMYSoJA/s1600/60387891_rwatercolor.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="261" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnFtW7j5pJ5KCMYLAZIT47pbFFQ2eSpLSP195pkGkrHJhyphenhyphen_3U-anJw1fbt_x6XppeF3A2lk7uFUVL9EyIVn39MVVSROeF1TOSJZUqKaAHZ4wXjXMHIlcXCRhF_84_qk6g8ZnffLMYSoJA/s400/60387891_rwatercolor.jpg" tt="true" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">Some people are always grumbling because roses have thorns. I am thankful that thorns have roses. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">~~Alphonse Kerr. </span></span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-41261259027694926302010-04-02T00:15:00.000-07:002010-05-11T03:14:17.266-07:00The LakeI fell into a lake. It was vast and dark and mirky and all things terrible. I couldn't swim and I had no life vest. I was drowning. I kicked my legs and flapped my arms and screamed at the top of my lungs. It was only me. Me, the water and the wind. The water would swallow me and the winds carry my screams with it. I gave up. To the bottom I would sink and there would be my grave. Only the bottom came much more quickly than expected... I stretched out my legs and felt dirt. I trembled with relief as I stood up. Alas, this lake was only a puddle.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPHK2wxrZtggiEtEzYWMDhtkfMpiK8n381aXDEl-XPSg9iEv9lUSOfEb6L2FuYI3fbNzUVwgyWE4LNZIaODwtOsJXI7sJ1t87dbKBB8DJO9raXN7lLtepkmF9dWYPX-c_DkTxz6qWqZB0/s1600/ever25635-bw.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="161" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPHK2wxrZtggiEtEzYWMDhtkfMpiK8n381aXDEl-XPSg9iEv9lUSOfEb6L2FuYI3fbNzUVwgyWE4LNZIaODwtOsJXI7sJ1t87dbKBB8DJO9raXN7lLtepkmF9dWYPX-c_DkTxz6qWqZB0/s400/ever25635-bw.jpg" tt="true" width="400" /></a></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-53616160005886452212010-03-23T01:20:00.000-07:002010-03-23T22:02:29.733-07:00What a Mess<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFmVWVx3p7uXClcmcpmB33SAdpTY7dS5TkPadsgiVV8bX7Bqs85drtx6PLyWloRPCMJJb9ddPA7ODoZreqgIH52X0xFcDMt34w0AsQSMI715MmPgxfktXOi-CvgpTK1FJqQZCGkhyphenhyphenSefg/s1600-h/hahaha.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFmVWVx3p7uXClcmcpmB33SAdpTY7dS5TkPadsgiVV8bX7Bqs85drtx6PLyWloRPCMJJb9ddPA7ODoZreqgIH52X0xFcDMt34w0AsQSMI715MmPgxfktXOi-CvgpTK1FJqQZCGkhyphenhyphenSefg/s320/hahaha.jpg" vt="true" /></a></div><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Bubbling over, spilling out</span><br />
<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s1600-h/Heart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s320/Heart.jpg" vt="true" /></span></a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">There's laughter getting everywhere</span></div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s1600-h/Heart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s320/Heart.jpg" vt="true" /></span></a><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">It's on the walls, on my shoes</span><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s1600-h/Heart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s320/Heart.jpg" vt="true" /></span></a><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Boy, we've made a mess in here!</span><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s1600-h/Heart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s320/Heart.jpg" vt="true" /></span></a><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">I saw some hit the ceiling fan</span><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s1600-h/Heart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s320/Heart.jpg" vt="true" /></span></a><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">And a little above the closet</span><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s1600-h/Heart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s320/Heart.jpg" vt="true" /></span></a><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">We really ought to clean it up</span><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s1600-h/Heart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrSKz_9fuavDPY2dJXxjrl0k-iNTGIAZa4WGk6c-XLQceasJ95Mr8esBAClmZR_4GmDRAKhuqSQU4GZKRXX0D-B0UCfFwvWAG8OwAbh7bjF6TY3Q2pz0m9Utb45MvyRWJrg9jlpyv2Nvs/s320/Heart.jpg" vt="true" /></span></a><br />
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">But I say let's just leave it!</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-80315498014217238532010-03-23T00:58:00.000-07:002010-07-28T23:41:11.479-07:00insomnia<span style="color: #999999;">i'm haunted by the memory</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;">late at night it's all i see</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;">it's in the air above my bed</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;">it's in my veins in my head</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;"><br />
</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;">each breath i take is thick with it</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;">my stomach aches i'm sick with it</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;">the darkness presses in </span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;">and yet again i'm reliving</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;"><br />
</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;">the horror happened far from here</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;">but the mind's eye is much too near</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;">freedom calls and taunts me</span><br />
<span style="color: #999999;">still still the touch haunts me</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-40366811516134437892010-03-21T23:30:00.000-07:002010-03-21T23:32:24.211-07:00i carry your heart with me<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkPNuW6DPOTytlpWsYQlmJN24aCI5zAHn0O1RTWP595EFCRfPoa1Ja6bhqOG3J5U68dzf19lnDwajBTgqi3_apjXMSjRRV6WECOO8J7R6M0RGAj61eldHxE1aEru-4IlWUIOYDuCmtOd8/s1600-h/heart_of_sand-1824%5B1%5D.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkPNuW6DPOTytlpWsYQlmJN24aCI5zAHn0O1RTWP595EFCRfPoa1Ja6bhqOG3J5U68dzf19lnDwajBTgqi3_apjXMSjRRV6WECOO8J7R6M0RGAj61eldHxE1aEru-4IlWUIOYDuCmtOd8/s320/heart_of_sand-1824%5B1%5D.jpg" vt="true" /></a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">i carry your heart with me(i carry it in</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">my heart)i am never without it(anywhere</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">by only me is your doing,my darling)</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">i fear</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and whatever a sun will always sing is you</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">here is the deepest secret nobody knows</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart</span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="text-align: right;"><br />
</div><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart) </span></div><div style="text-align: right;"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><span style="color: #ea9999;"> </span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: right;"><span style="color: #ea9999; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">~~e.e. cummings</span> </div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMC2hPFkxNN34aLIjH7Oj65Mxupn7ip-tLkH97zd2t60h2aRXKM4PfU3Q9OVfsiBdj_BMFNB_mMddpSRWwzH-rVdBr2KkYF9GBq44EBMQKiySVR2hRTEW80BkZHYecAcRnmeMsa4bO7VY/s1600-h/carry_me_away__by_samaurai.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMC2hPFkxNN34aLIjH7Oj65Mxupn7ip-tLkH97zd2t60h2aRXKM4PfU3Q9OVfsiBdj_BMFNB_mMddpSRWwzH-rVdBr2KkYF9GBq44EBMQKiySVR2hRTEW80BkZHYecAcRnmeMsa4bO7VY/s320/carry_me_away__by_samaurai.jpg" vt="true" /></a></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-61197707834940351852010-03-20T14:41:00.000-07:002010-03-20T15:51:24.069-07:00Sitting at the End of the World<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjw19886HLVwlCPOIO98usVDI62PcmX27Tbf3nreMk2JTugFK0c0gbuTn5wkdt8p4xFlgJR_2jRKDoBiSjk9nqwSvC4yh-sfBCKRtfDRls5afj8u-dsmhCNMj1QcOdv0xCkMHiNJRTKpU/s1600-h/the_last_stand_by_ataplata-198x300.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjw19886HLVwlCPOIO98usVDI62PcmX27Tbf3nreMk2JTugFK0c0gbuTn5wkdt8p4xFlgJR_2jRKDoBiSjk9nqwSvC4yh-sfBCKRtfDRls5afj8u-dsmhCNMj1QcOdv0xCkMHiNJRTKpU/s320/the_last_stand_by_ataplata-198x300.jpg" vt="true" /></a></div><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>I sat down at the end of the world</strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>I let my feet dangle as the ages pass by</strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>I thought about the lives and stories and sighs</strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>I watched them float into the night</strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc;"><br />
<strong><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span></strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>There's no room for regret at the end</strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>Only room to remember and breathe and say goodbye</strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>I thought it would look different</strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>But it's kinda nice, seeing the time fly</strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc;"><br />
<strong><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"></span></strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>I leaned over the edge and stared with awe</strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>To think, this is where it all goes</strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>This is the place we all will arrive</strong></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #fff2cc; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><strong>But, ah, what is next? No one knows...</strong></span><br />
<br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiICc0KuWFX0hjt9BxObUUY5S5Dqj9nopCNvCNlFgdMvsE1Np6RKZ1haBqOH-VJMXjqaNaP0bD_NxDFUcP_-QlXrqdzgJkMJFCZmoSe1AXNtNbvLLLiWEVyTQRemP8UBQYGnl3tKM4kEgw/s1600-h/heaven_or_hell______by_karil-300x286.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiICc0KuWFX0hjt9BxObUUY5S5Dqj9nopCNvCNlFgdMvsE1Np6RKZ1haBqOH-VJMXjqaNaP0bD_NxDFUcP_-QlXrqdzgJkMJFCZmoSe1AXNtNbvLLLiWEVyTQRemP8UBQYGnl3tKM4kEgw/s320/heaven_or_hell______by_karil-300x286.jpg" vt="true" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-30970500611119119762010-02-25T00:23:00.000-08:002010-02-25T00:23:13.371-08:00hilariousha ha ha <br />
what a clever, funny joke<br />
i laughed so long and hard<br />
my heart just bloody broke<br />
<br />
you always think your humour<br />
is so cunning, full of wit<br />
but everytime you tell a joke <br />
i feel i've just been hit<br />
<br />
won't you leave me alone for once<br />
i can't take it much more<br />
the good you think you're bringing here<br />
you've simply settled the scoreUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-3144042381522973072010-02-25T00:07:00.000-08:002010-02-25T00:08:43.109-08:00for rachel<div style="text-align: center;">asleep</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">i saw you last night in my dreams</div><div style="text-align: center;">i don't know if you noticed me</div><div style="text-align: center;">as i watched you laugh and smile</div><div style="text-align: center;">your spirit was so alive</div><div style="text-align: center;">your eyes aglow</div><div style="text-align: center;">i suppose it should have cheered me</div><div style="text-align: center;">i cried instead</div><div style="text-align: center;">you saw me and waved</div><div style="text-align: center;">i told you to come back</div><div style="text-align: center;">you just kissed my face and turned to leave</div><div style="text-align: center;">down upon my knees i begged you</div><div style="text-align: center;">not to go again</div><div style="text-align: center;">we need you here</div><div style="text-align: center;">the memory of you has become so dim</div><div style="text-align: center;">your light so small</div><div style="text-align: center;">the tears fell as i wept</div><div style="text-align: center;">you pulled me to my feet and said</div><div style="text-align: center;">i'd see you again</div><div style="text-align: center;">then i awoke</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">i prayed for sleep to find me again</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-11849366548436971962010-02-24T23:58:00.000-08:002010-02-24T23:58:22.992-08:00I Could Fake It I like you<br />
But I don’t really want to<br />
I think of you<br />
Would you kindly get out of my head? <br />
<br />
I hate you<br />
Or at least, I’m trying to<br />
You’re too nice<br />
What’s the matter with you? <br />
<br />
I don’t want to fall for you<br />
I don’t want to open up to you<br />
But I’m falling and I’m opening<br />
Maybe I could fake it?<br />
<br />
You look at me<br />
Like I’m worth looking at<br />
You smile at me<br />
Like I make your whole world turn <br />
<br />
You’re beautiful<br />
Would you please cut that out?<br />
You’re perfect<br />
God, you’re driving me out of my mind <br />
<br />
I don’t want to fall for you<br />
I don’t want to open up to you<br />
But I’m falling and I’m opening<br />
Maybe I could fake it?<br />
<br />
I’m scared to death<br />
And I want you to leave me alone<br />
But I’m crazy about you<br />
What have you done to me?<br />
What have you done to me? <br />
<br />
I don’t want to fall for you<br />
I don’t want to open up to you<br />
But I’m falling and I’m opening<br />
Maybe I could fake it?<br />
But I don’t want to<br />
Not this time<br />
No, not this time <br />
<br />
Here I am, please don’t break meUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-84688506088058969582010-02-17T23:36:00.000-08:002010-02-24T23:51:26.080-08:00Oscar<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIKRV8zuD-tgXYQMfPmODEWET5x-4PTyiDCgT5udIu8Jujv7HT-Cem6ZkfpBZwBOq3gi-vjKHONggWkn-yNuTu30xVmOpGeqX_QXrwntbfcXw8d5DCDGyV0N1_r8rv7xqlAKmzKSp-GiM/s1600-h/rroar.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" ct="true" height="195" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIKRV8zuD-tgXYQMfPmODEWET5x-4PTyiDCgT5udIu8Jujv7HT-Cem6ZkfpBZwBOq3gi-vjKHONggWkn-yNuTu30xVmOpGeqX_QXrwntbfcXw8d5DCDGyV0N1_r8rv7xqlAKmzKSp-GiM/s200/rroar.jpg" width="200" /></a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
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</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
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</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="color: #660000;">"Roar," said the lion</span></div></div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="color: #660000;">who was really a little mouse</span></div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="color: #660000;">His tiny paws </span></div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="color: #660000;">turned mighty claws</span></div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="color: #660000;">and saved my life from dragons</span></div></div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="color: #660000;">Though toil and troubles may hunt me</span></div></div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="color: #660000;">and truest dangers ne'er more found</span></div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="color: #660000;">I shall not fear</span></div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="color: #660000;">the horrors here</span></div></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="color: #660000;">for I am safe and sound</span></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-7160639006596653602010-02-08T14:46:00.000-08:002011-01-15T13:46:30.746-08:00Stranger<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: black;"></span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-v96dCHqcEQqUrfpfmHSDc4PRe2vlQbm8oMdTkVwgL6vVLfyCbBlI7eR8JOsXwMm3ap1ev5Enr6QYig6H7G3zDPaI-7jYrMXHAwh0S4n-iqZwmqae4rChw_nmX0FuWFyurt-RS0njoP8/s1600-h/once+upon+a+time.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; cssfloat: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="background-color: black;"><img border="0" height="133" kt="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-v96dCHqcEQqUrfpfmHSDc4PRe2vlQbm8oMdTkVwgL6vVLfyCbBlI7eR8JOsXwMm3ap1ev5Enr6QYig6H7G3zDPaI-7jYrMXHAwh0S4n-iqZwmqae4rChw_nmX0FuWFyurt-RS0njoP8/s200/once+upon+a+time.jpg" width="200" /></span></a><span style="font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #a64d79;"><span style="color: #741b47; font-size: large;"><em></em></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #444444;"><span style="background-color: black;"><span style="font-size: large;"><em> I fell.</em></span> </span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79;">It wasn't down a rabbit's hole, though it felt close. I landed on my hands and knees, feeling the grass beneath me, cushioning me. I wasn't too battered; I'd live. I dusted myself off as I got to my feet. Took a moment to glance around me and realized I was suddenly a long way from home. Immediately I was afraid. I wanted to return to the comforts of the familiar and the safety of the ordinary. Everything I saw looked ominous and menacing-- the fragrant roses threatened to tear my flesh with their thorns. The glimmering lake could bury me beneath its surface. It was all so dangerous and unknown. I closed my eyes and wished myself home, but it didn't work. I was here and I was alone.</span></span></div><span style="background-color: black;"><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;">Except that I wasn't alone. There was a kind face staring into my own, smiling at me. A hand outstretched in offering. So harmless, if I would only just trust. Yet my trained eyes saw what was sneaking in the shawdows of unassuming goodness. Oh yes, there was a truer danger here in the sweet looks and the caring smiles. More so than that of thorns and thrashing waves. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;">I could not allow myself to be fooled by the enticing beauty, so I pushed. As hard as I possibly could, I pushed the affection away from me. I pushed until I fell backwards. And it hurt. But as I looked up, the person was still looming, still a tender figure, a look of amusement in its eyes. A hand stretched out farther this time, so to reach me, prostrate on the ground. After moments of torn silence I gave in. What could it hurt, to allow a stranger to help me in the slightest of ways? It felt uncomfortable and thrilling, all at once, to put a morsel of faith in someone I truly didn't know. But it didn't mean I liked them.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;">As soon as I was on my feet, I pulled my hand away. But it wouldn't come. At first I assumed it was because the gentle grip had tightened, forcing my appendage to stay. I looked into the brown eys, feeling panicked and afraid, but the eyes were still calm and kind. Then I saw that my very own hand was the traitor. Tightly I held onto the soft palm, against my will. My hand liked the strange hand and it wanted to stay where it was. Stupid hand.</span><br />
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<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;">Fine. I would indulge my hand. I would stay for a few, stay and cast a sideways glance at the person who had seduced my reckless fingers. The face was resplendent and the glow hurt my eyes. I would look away, but I really didn't want to. What was happening to me? How and when did I become so careless? I used to be an expert at protecting myself, and here I was, begging for the wolves to come and eat me alive.</span></div><span style="background-color: black;"><br />
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<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;">"Who are you?" My voice had an echo in this mysterious place. </span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="background-color: black;"><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79;"></span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="background-color: black; clear: right; color: #a64d79; cssfloat: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"></span><span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;">A smile, wider this time. Dimples. Of course this angel had dimples. It was a mirage of innocence, designed to make me fall. "You know who I am." </span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="background-color: black;"><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79;"></span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"><span style="color: #d5a6bd; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79;">Did I? I squinted at the radiant stranger. It was rather familiar, this hand in mine, this warmth that was now embracing me. I felt a peace, a fearlessness I hadn't felt in so long. I never wanted to let go. I looked in awe at my surroundings. There were an array of the most vibrant flowers, slashed across a lazy meadow. The lake that had threatened to engulf me turned out to be placid and blue. There were butterflies and hummingbirds and robins scattered through the caressing breeze. I was most definitely standing in a wonderland, accompanied by the loveliest creature I had ever seen. The tranquility never left Stranger's face. I wanted to be lost in its enchantments. I desperately yearned to feel the joy that flowed from its eyes. That's when careful arms wrapped themselves around me.</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #d5a6bd; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79;">Those arms were a cacophony of strength and fragility, as though they knew the importance of slow caution. I was the proverbial deer in the headlights. But the strangest thing yet happened. Instead of the desire to flee, I melted into the folded arms. All of my fears, all of my hurt and all of my lonelieness came forth and I began to cry. I cried for the lost child inside of me. I cried for the years I had spent pushing and for the wasted breath of a life unlived. The arms became tighter. So much so that I could do nothing but allow all my weight to be born by Stranger and its comforting arms. </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #d5a6bd; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79;">Eventually my eyes dried and I rested my weary soul on the shoulder of Stranger. It was the most peculiar feeling I had ever experienced. I was safe, I was cared for, I was happy. It was devine. I spent what felt like hours drinking in the effervescent colours that danced around us. I would never leave this Utopia, with all it's whimsy and hope. </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #d5a6bd; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79;">My breathing slowed and I knew I had slept for several minutes as soon as I reopened my heavy eyes. Again I stared at the glorious scenery. I noticed with mild surprise that there was a chill in the air, but it was all right. Stranger emanated heat from its body and I was able to look up into the great sky. It was now a speckled navy blue, freckles of stars blinking and giggling down on us. I fell back into sleep.</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #d5a6bd; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79;">This time when I woke we were laying in the soft grass, daisies and daffodils swaying around us. Stranger appeared to be asleep and the breeze blew colder than before. I pressed myself into Stranger's hold, and in doing so, Stranger's eyes flicked open and I was greeted with a smile. </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #d5a6bd; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79;">"I'm sorry I woke you, Stranger... I'm just a little cold."</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #d5a6bd; font-family: Times, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79;">Stranger laughed. It was a pretty, chiming sound, like bells or chattering water in a magical stream. "My name is not Stranger." As the echos of Stranger's words calmed, a soft cloak was wrapped around me.</span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">I blushed furiously. "I know. But... but I don't know your name. You haven't told me."</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">A hand under my chin lifted my embarassed gaze back to the bewitching face. "Yes, my dear, I assure you, you do know my name."</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">Another flash of shame. How could I not know my wonderful savior? Surely I would've remembered someone so... so... good. But there it was again. A tiny hint of familiarity. Just out of my reach. On the edge of my memory. I was angry at myself for not being able to capture the thought. Really, though. Clearly, I wasn`t the one in control of this situation. Stranger, or whatever its name was, could just tell me. Have an ounce of mercy, for crying out loud. Look at what I had been through. I was desolate for so long.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">The indignation flowed through my veins, igniting me. I shoved back slightly, only to let loose a grunt when I realized Stranger`s arms were too securely engulfing me. That only irritated me more. ``Let go.``</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">Stranger`s face, for the first time since I had entered this mysterious location, wasn't warm and soft and joyful. There was a mixture of compassion and a pulsing hurt in its expression. I felt a jab of guilt, but the guilt only served to feed my fire. Why should<em> I </em>be to blame for it holding onto me that firmly?</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">It dawned on me that I felt a little cramped. I needed to stand and stretch and Stranger wasn't releasing me fast enough. I kicked slightly, and squirmed like a toddler in the beginnings of a tantrum. "I said, <em>let go!</em>"</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">Stranger dropped its arm as though I had struck it. The distress on its face turned my heart cold with regret, but I ignored it and scrambled to my feet. Once there, I looked down on the majestic creature. Now that I was standing above Stranger, I saw a vulnerabilty I hadn't noticed before. I softened. "Please tell me your name?" I queried.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">A hint of delight crept back into Stranger's expression and my guilt was assuaged. "You truly do not recall my name, dearest? Not even from when you were a child?"</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">"<em>What</em>," I exploded, "does this have to do with my childhood? You know nothing of me or where I have come from! Do not pressume that you've seen my type before and that you know how to ease my troubles! Those are none of your concern!" I spun quickly away from the cowered being and crossed my arms over my chest, protecting my bare arms from the biting cold.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">The contrast of a tender hand on my shoulder nearly warmed my whole back. I ached with the desire to just forget this whole thing and fall back into kind and gracious arms. But my pride, ah, such a noble and terrible thing, my pride kept me from turning around. I would not crumble. I had been weak enough for one day. "Leave me, Stranger."</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">The silence hung in the air like fish suspended in water, swarming me with the pain it often causes. <em> </em>"I mean it, Stranger. I don't care what your name is. I want you to go." I felt my insides quake at the thought of Stranger actually leaving. A part of me knew it would call my bluff and sweep me off my feet and never let go. Another part of me worried, W<em>hat if it actually goes away? </em> I couldn't bear to be alone again. Not after feeling the protection and hope I had experienced here in Never Neverland.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">"Do you mean this, dearest one?" There was a tremble in the powerful voice that hadn't been there before. "Do you truly know what you ask?"</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">I huffed with exasperation. "Yes, of course I do. I don't need you. I don't need anyone but myself." I paused to steel myself. <em>Like a Band-aid, </em>I told myself. "Now, go."</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">And it went. I could feel it leave, though there was no sound. Stranger, with all its glory and devastating goodness, had left me. And the break in my heart nearly dropped me to my knees. I was a once-full vessel that was now dried up and barren and the loss of it all shocked me. I could lay down to die, the affliction so horrible. Indeed, death would be a welcome relief.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">I did eventually fall to the ground. For a time I couldn't even bring myself to cry, I simply curled up and bled out my self-pity. But the tears came. They came and they swept me away. I didn't notice when it began to rain. I didn't notice the winds pick up and whip my hair around. I didn't even notice the menacing eyes in the night, sizing me up for tonight's dinner. I would've gladly gone with the beasts, had I known.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">At a point in the night, I got to my feet and began to walk. I wasn't paying attention to where I was going, I just walked. And walked. I walked until I was no longer numb. The ache in my tired feet spread to my legs, which awaked my torso and made its way to my head. Then I stopped abruptly. I was home.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">I felt an enormous amount of consolation at the sight of my beloved little house and I rushed inside, slamming the door behind me. I leaned against the door, hoping my weight would keep the whole nightmare at bay. One long breath, in, out, then another. It was all going to be okay.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">But it wasn't. I looked at my things. Flat. Lifeless. Dull. The belongings that once meant so much to me, the small joys I had missed so much when they were gone... it was all meaningless. It was meaningless because I had discovered a new kind of meaning, one I had not enjoyed since I was a child, in the arms of my mother. The love she had given me so freely, the way she held me tight enough to keep the horrors of the world out of reach, it was so similar to Stranger's unceasing embrace.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">Stranger. Oh, god. Of course. Stranger wasn't a stranger at all. Stranger was Love. Love that I had known so well when my mother held me safe and sound. Love that I had run away from in rebellion and spite. Love which I had just banished. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">And now I was alone. Just as I had asked. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">I had thought that I could protect myself from pain by building the walls that would keep Love out. Little did I know how cold and empty I was, until I let Love in.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: black; color: #a64d79; font-family: Times;">And now I was alone. Just as I had asked.</span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-36814651752710153242010-02-06T22:41:00.000-08:002010-02-06T23:08:51.663-08:00Down<div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4pjKgYU_RoYxswcY1R8JwoeQtqP8rBn61BpZkHiLaLbsXQXbVFAixnPg5XR9EUACw9WdEcLuRsxx-1MW-MWL4mSWfZFXgyvCAHjdT3sfU7XBnk735UdtdcndN4SnjTUZoXBmy8bsOfR4/s1600-h/storm-over-ocean.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="419" kt="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4pjKgYU_RoYxswcY1R8JwoeQtqP8rBn61BpZkHiLaLbsXQXbVFAixnPg5XR9EUACw9WdEcLuRsxx-1MW-MWL4mSWfZFXgyvCAHjdT3sfU7XBnk735UdtdcndN4SnjTUZoXBmy8bsOfR4/s640/storm-over-ocean.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">I don’t know where I’m at</div><div style="text-align: center;">I’m standing at the back</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">And I’m tired of waiting</div><div style="text-align: center;">Waiting here in line, hoping that I’ll find what I’ve been chasing.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">I shot for the sky</div><div style="text-align: center;">I’m stuck on the ground</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">So why do I try, I know I’m gonna to fall down</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?</div><div style="text-align: center;">Never know why it’s coming down, down, down.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">Not ready to let go</div><div style="text-align: center;">Cause then I'd never know</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">What I could be missing</div><div style="text-align: center;">But I’m missing way too much</div><div style="text-align: center;">So when do I give up what I’ve been wishing for.</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;">I shot for the sky</div><div style="text-align: center;">I’m stuck on the ground</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">So why do I try, I know I’m gonna to fall down</div><div style="text-align: center;">I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">Never know why it’s coming down, down, down.</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">Oh I am going down, down, down</div><div style="text-align: center;">Can’t find another way around</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: #cccccc; color: #4c1130; font-size: large;"><em>And I don’t want to hear the sound, of losing what I never found.</em></span></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">I shot for the sky</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">I’m stuck on the ground</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">So why do I try, I know I’m gonna to fall down</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">I thought I could fly, so why did I drown?</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">Oh it’s coming down, down, down.</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;">Jason Walker</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none; clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyT3NSOC35uvLdcJutQ91KNKhl9XEt1hO2KPcV_Fy66dJkwmO65jjrdI_nvwWUygNYBMM5cNLudf4UoUwnVwek2dBrHFlZY7yS6Nmf4h_cndi3zMEbAEGt6WB2gp-Qr0ADjM7pDi6lqw8/s1600-h/sad0016.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" kt="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyT3NSOC35uvLdcJutQ91KNKhl9XEt1hO2KPcV_Fy66dJkwmO65jjrdI_nvwWUygNYBMM5cNLudf4UoUwnVwek2dBrHFlZY7yS6Nmf4h_cndi3zMEbAEGt6WB2gp-Qr0ADjM7pDi6lqw8/s320/sad0016.gif" width="242" /></a></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-953234555095440305.post-89758583054922678432010-02-02T00:57:00.000-08:002010-02-02T00:57:49.069-08:00The State of Love<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAbd5iIPvWT86ofNGDDy1Cs81ZiEdmP16Kis1aP6RtyrlXkQjgninviKswsg9EYudVloZSIRZvdVPOYDgVuC-R6b9cT89oNstFPz9pEXoJNk4MNS70_IkhMcgSk0SXTGARZJ1vMbQuCSY/s1600-h/heart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" kt="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAbd5iIPvWT86ofNGDDy1Cs81ZiEdmP16Kis1aP6RtyrlXkQjgninviKswsg9EYudVloZSIRZvdVPOYDgVuC-R6b9cT89oNstFPz9pEXoJNk4MNS70_IkhMcgSk0SXTGARZJ1vMbQuCSY/s320/heart.jpg" /></a></div>The best thing about being in love is waking up to dream of that person. Wondering what adventures lay for the two of you that day. Will he laugh at your joke, tipping his head back and letting loose the most beautiful sound in the world? Will an accidental compliment slip into mundane conversation, causing you to glow from within for the rest of the afternoon? Will you blush at just the thought of his hand on your back, leading you to do rash and naughty things to him later that night?<br />
<br />
<div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;">It's the suspense of the everyday simplicities of love that have made it worth living, killing and dying for. The grand gestures are fine, but the little glances, the tiniest of smirks, the least of romances that make for the preciousness of the state of love.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdo6uPElZ_IP18fTSnnU8o4KoBHcNThmvu6nZbKuB1AOe-KTpJBhIagaEOhMyKgR9nr3ZpoOAZ3nqmDmXApFzMJ4T0CEYS1vy3uEsZz8k3eIac_f6sBkMAAQRsThZ6GRq3eCzs7c_QS7c/s1600-h/kiss.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" kt="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdo6uPElZ_IP18fTSnnU8o4KoBHcNThmvu6nZbKuB1AOe-KTpJBhIagaEOhMyKgR9nr3ZpoOAZ3nqmDmXApFzMJ4T0CEYS1vy3uEsZz8k3eIac_f6sBkMAAQRsThZ6GRq3eCzs7c_QS7c/s320/kiss.jpg" /></a></div><div style="border-bottom: medium none; border-left: medium none; border-right: medium none; border-top: medium none;"></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0